“In the end, only three things matter:
How much you loved,
How gently you lived,
And how gracefully you let go of things not meant for you.”
- Buddhist saying
There’s something I’ve been working on this past year and I wasn’t even fully aware that I’ve been working on it until recently.
Not in the traditional kind of grief we associate with the passing of a loved one, breakups (though I‘ve had my fair share of that one), and other things had and lost. But the kind of grief that comes with growth. The mourning of what we thought we would or should have, and won’t.
I’ve always struggled with this. As someone with a vivid imagination, I can use it to dream up possibilities and paint pictures of a future not yet in reach. Though, it becomes so real and lifelike to me that I can attach to it. Relentlessly pursuing that colorful vision despite the diversions along the way. But sometimes that direction needs to be abandoned. Alternative options need to be considered. And a new expanded vision needs to be set in its place. With that abandonment, comes the grief of a future that could have been. The choices not made. The roads not traveled. The opportunity lost.
There is always loss associated with growth. Letting go of what we’ve been holding onto so tightly frees up the hand to grasp something new. Only then can you fully embrace the love and the life that is waiting for you.
Life by Design was born out of a need for my own self-healing after decades of unresolved illness. It wasn’t until finding the courage to look within that I discovered it was my own belief system holding me back from experiencing a truly thriving life. We all have access to that thriving life. We just need to rediscover our power and ignite the healing-self. Only then can we unapologetically live a life by our own design.