"We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorn bushes have roses."
Classic quote. I know. We've heard it. But here's the thing, there's a lot of truth to it. We've got to start romanticizing life.
To be completely transparent (we all know I’m a little too good at that), I came back to LA on Friday after spending time with my mom’s side of the family in San Francisco and kind of fell into a rut. I sunk a little. I had one week before heading to NYC to see my family and friends on the East Coast for the holidays and I started to really crave comfort and familiarity. I also started to starkly see the voids in my life. A big one being no significant other, and began to get nostalgic about what I had with my ex. I think as much as we’d all like to believe the holidays are the happiest time of the year, they can do that to you. If you allow it.
But if there’s anything I’ve learned this year, it’s that it’s ok to let yourself sink a little. You can go underwater, as long as you keep swimming. So I went there. I felt all the shit I needed to feel. I drove around the winding roads of Mulholland Drive and cried to all of my moody melancholic songs. I wrote about it. I moved it out of my system. Then I went to bed, woke up, and went for a morning walk.
On that walk, I passed a rose bush in Koreatown I haven’t walked by in a long time. I stopped to examine one of the roses that was taller than the rest. The long thick stem was covered in sharp thorns but all the way at the top lay a stunning red rose.
I think that’s what 2018 has taught me over and over again. You’ve got to create your own romance. You’ve got to start believing and seeing all of the beauty that’s around you from falling in love with the way the folds in your bedsheets catch the sunlight, to the silence of your morning commute, to that warming coffee that was poured just right. It’s all there, every day, waiting for you to notice. And the most interesting part; the more you notice, the more it appears. 🌹
Life by Design was born out of a need for my own self-healing after decades of unresolved illness. It wasn’t until finding the courage to look within that I discovered it was my own belief system holding me back from experiencing a truly thriving life. We all have access to that thriving life. We just need to rediscover our power and ignite the healing-self. Only then can we unapologetically live a life by our own design.